The Antijen Pages

To: jenstar@antijen.org
From: Meadhbh Siobhan
Subject: What do I want from life?

Hey Jen,

If you're still taking comments on the "What do I want from life?"
section, here's mine...

Mostly I want to be comfortable and confident.

I want to be confident in my career, friends and family. Confident that I can do a good job, that my friends won't abandon me, and that my family will accept me.

I first entered counseling in Texas for "unspecified gender disorders" when I was 19. After coming out I lost parts of my family, my friends, my significant other. My job was very accepting at the time, and like a 19 year old idiot, I quit that job without realizing what a joy it is to have co-workers that accept you.

What this taught me at the time was there were some things just to be suppressed.

But after 20 years of being uncomfortable in my own skin, I want to start again taking steps to build a "more familiar me."

So what I want now is understanding from friends, family and professional contacts. After moving to the San Francisco Bay Area, I've been able to surround myself with friends who couldn't care less about how I express my gender identity. My family is coming around, and with a few notable exceptions, businesses around here are pretty supportive.

So I guess now what I want is simply time to spend with family and friends and an uneventful transition...

-Cheers!
-Meadhbh

From: "Emily
To:
Subject: what i want

I want A name and body which matches up to how I feel inside
I want To feel right outside and inside my skin

I want to be understood,being a young ftm isn't easy,I dont have any trans friends,and i only ever met transgirls,i feel so alone
I wish the world could see me for who i am, not what i was born as, we need positive role models like you who have been through what were going through
I want trans people to be on mainstream tele, not as a talkshow freak

I want to walk down the street a positve, respected man,With Pride of who he is,Not in a shell of something im not inside
I wish i wasn't feeling this way,
I wish i was the man i am ment to be,

love Emlyn
xx